Here is Love
by NeonDomino
Summary: Western!AU - After meeting Sirius Black, Remus finds himself confused over his attraction to the other man. He never imagined that two men could fall in love with each other.


**Here Is Love**

 **Western AU**

 **Thanks to Lizzy for betaing**

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 _Guys, I have to wonder how many people read my stories anymore. I feel like I put a lot of effort into writing these and when I get like 1 or 2 reviews, it kinda gets me down and feels like I'm wasting my time now. I enjoy writing and I like to know that people enjoy reading it._

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Remus spent the morning listening to people talking as he waited on their tables in the tea-house. They were all talking about the newest family to move into town - the Black family - the ones who had been working on building the railway through.

The town was excited. The railroad being extended would make a difference to their town. More people travelling through meant more business, more growth… and for Remus' parents, more people visiting their little tea-house.

But the railroad wasn't ready yet. It would take some time to progress from that town to to the next, and for however long that took, the Blacks would be staying in the empty house on the edge of their small town.

Remus set the tray down, lifting off the teapot. He mentally checked everything off as he moved the cups and everything else onto the table in front of his friend, James.

"Alice?" he asked.

James gave a small shrug. "Do you blame me?"

Remus turned around to look at the girl who worked with him on weekends. She was pretty, sure. She was lovely and a good friend. But he just didn't see it like James did. He didn't tell James this, but merely shrugged his shoulders. It was hard to explain that he just didn't see girls in the same way.

"If you have a break, come and sit with me," James insisted.

Remus shook his head. "I think Alice is due one soon," he replied, turning to walk away. "Oh. Did you hear that Frank and Lily are expecting?"

"Really?" James' eyes widened. "So what does that mean?"

"It means neither are coming back," Remus confirmed. "I haven't told Alice yet though so should I tell her to join you? I thought the news would be easier coming from you since you're both in the same boat. Bonding over losing the loves of your lives to each other. Anything holding either of you back before… well, hopefully you can both finally move on."

James grinned. "If you don't mind." He glanced over at Alice, hazel eyes assessing her. "I just don't get it, Remus. The girls in this town adore you. I was always scared that Lily would want to run off with you instead. Not that you'd do that to me of course, but I worried about how _she_ felt. Marlene keeps asking you to help when she has heavy groceries, Dorcas tried to get you to go to the local dance with her. You work with _Alice_."

"Your point?" Remus asked, clutching the tray hard enough that his knuckles turned white. His friend was oblivious to this though.

James sighed, reaching up to run his hand through his hair. "I don't know. It's just all of them are so different from each other. Before when Alice was with Frank, I honestly thought you were turning other girls down because of some feelings for her. But when Frank chose Lily… you aren't interested in Alice either - so what is your type?"

"I don't know," Remus confessed. "I'll let you know when I work it out myself."

James nodded, distracted by Alice at the counter. "She's smiling more than before," he commented. "I think my news is going to be a kick in the teeth. I hate taking that away from her."

"I can tell her," Remus offered.

James shook his head. "You're right. It'll be easier coming from me. From others she just gets pitying stares, but I understand. When Frank broke up with her, Lily left me too. They announced their wedding a few days later… I'm the only person here who understands how much it hurts." He sighed again. "How far along?"

"Six months my mum said," Remus replied. "They broke up with you four months ago. James, is the baby—"

"Mum always taught me to be respectful and wait," James muttered sadly. He fiddled with the napkin in front of him, tearing at it with his fingers. "Do you think they only ran away together because of the baby?"

Remus shrugged. "I'm not sure. They were sleeping together, James. Frank didn't sleep with Alice and you didn't sleep with Lily so don't read into whether you'd be together had the pregnancy not happened. Because they had an affair. You and Alice didn't mean enough to either of them to stay faithful."

"I know. I don't want her back after what she did, but… I just keep trying to make sense of it."

"And I don't think you'll ever know the answer," Remus replied. "I expect that's why they married so quickly and left town the day after the wedding."

James turned his gaze back to Alice and Remus walked away, glad that his mother's tea-house wasn't busy. James often came in, needing someone to talk to. As he had devoted his time to Lily in the past, James was at a loss during his free time so would often seek Remus out.

He headed back to the counter.

"Is he okay?" Alice asked, concerned as she glanced over, meeting James' hazel eyes and offering a smile.

Remus gave a small shake of his head. "He's getting there, same as you," he replied. "Go and sit with him, take a break - it's not busy."

"I was going to wash some cups out back," Alice insisted.

"I've got it," Remus replied. "Just give me a shout if someone comes in."

Alice nodded her head and set the tray of dirty cups down.

"Bring some cakes," Remus insisted. He grabbed the tray and walked through the doorway into the back room to wash them.

...oOo...

"Remus," Alice called.

Remus abandoned his task and quickly left the room, drying his hands on a towel as he approached. His eyes fell on a group of strangers, so he pulled on his best smile, beaming at all of them.

"Welcome to the Moonlight Teahouse. You must be new to town, so let me make you some tea and cakes on the house to welcome you."

The woman stared at him assessingly, her mouth turned down and Remus could see that she wasn't someone who smiled often.

"That's very kind of you," a man said, moving to stand beside her, glancing at her warily. "This is my mother, Walburga Black. I'm Regulus, and the one looking at the cake display is my older brother, Sirius." He held out his hand and Remus quickly shook it.

"I've heard of your name," Remus replied. "Take a seat and I'll be along shortly. Do you have a preference?"

Regulus gestured to his brother as his mother walked to a table by the window, and Remus turned around, heading over.

"Excuse me, Mr. Black, what tea would you like today?"

The man looked up and Remus' breath caught at the beautiful grey eyes that were suddenly fixed on him. The man's gaze lingered on his face for a long moment before his lips curved up in a seductive way.

"You know, the newspaper stated that tea offers certain… virtues."

"Does it?" Remus asked, curiously.

"It's said to make the body active—"

"That's good—" Remus began.

"—and lusty," the man continued, his eyebrow raising slightly. "I imagine you drink a lot of tea, working here. Does it make you lusty?"

"I… er…"

The man's eyes drifted down Remus' body and he smirked. "I bet it does," he murmured softly. "I've never had tea before so any… virtues that come from it, I'll of course blame you."

"I'm… sorry?"

"Just original tea," Sirius requested. "A plate of your most sought after delectories. Please set up a tab for us, I've taken a liking to this place and I'll make sure the bill is paid weekly."

"Of course," Remus said, nodding his head. They didn't usually allow tabs, but this family were powerful and Remus didn't have the ability to refuse this handsome stranger. He reached for one of the plates, loading one of each of the six most delicious cakes that they sold, eager to make a good impression on the new family in town. The two men seemed friendly, though the woman seemed slightly cold. But Remus wasn't going to judge - the idea of moving to a new town and getting to know people was a scary one - he couldn't blame this woman.

He loaded everything onto a tray and headed over, serving the family their tea. His eyes somehow met those of the elder brother, Sirius, and the man's lips curved into the same smile from before.

"Thank you," he murmured.

Remus gave a slight nod and retreated quickly behind the counter, unsure of why the man's gaze was so captivating. As he tidied the already tidy space, he couldn't help his gaze moving across the room and to the stranger.

At least it wasn't just him, he thought to himself. Sirius Black seemed to be looking at him just as much.

...oOo...

It was a week before they returned. Sirius was quick to order more tea and a selection of cakes, winking at Remus as he did so. Remus wasn't quite sure what the wink meant but quickly selected a different six cakes and brought over a teapot and some cups.

He found himself behind the counter again, just trying not to stare. Sirius was wearing a smart suit again and Remus couldn't help but notice how good he looked in it.

"Fascinating, aren't they?" Alice whispered, appearing next to him and making him jump.

"Just trying to get a read on them," Remus murmured in reply.

"The mother… I've not heard anything on her just yet. The younger of the brothers, Regulus - he's stopped in at the general store three times already, lingering when Marlene is there. But the older one… he's a bit like you, it seems. Hasn't had eyes for any of the girls in town yet."

Remus didn't know how to respond to this, only that Sirius may hold the answers to whatever it was that stopped Remus from settling with a nice girl.

Or maybe Sirius was as confused as he was?

...oOo...

"You weren't at the teahouse today."

Remus jumped and silently cursed himself. How did people manage to sneak up on him all of the time? He turned around to find Sirius Black leaning against the wall.

Though in place of the suit and the tidy hair, he was wearing a stetson hat and a pair of jeans and a shirt, his sleeves rolled to his elbows and chaps over his jeans. Remus couldn't help that his gaze moved so slowly, taking in the new look.

"Are cattle that much more interesting than the railroad?" he finally asked, his mouth feeling slightly dry. How had he never noticed that the cowboy look was so… fascinating?

Sirius smirked, pushing himself away from the wall and walking over. "Not particularly, but in the city, we don't dress like this. I like it."

"The hat suits you," Remus replied.

"You have the day off. You can show me around town," Sirius decided. "I only know our house, the general shop and the teahouse. Oh, and the station."

"I heard that Emmeline offered to give you a tour," Remus murmured.

Sirius gave a slight shrug. "I was waiting for you to offer," he merely replied. His gaze drifted down Remus' body so slowly, it made Remus shiver. "Cardigans?"

"Mum visited the city and saw they were in fashion. She took a liking to them and I find them quite comfortable." Remus tugged on it a little. "Does it look fine?"

"It looks…" Sirius' gaze moved up to his eyes. "Perfect. No - _you_ look perfect. Though I'm sure you look good _out_ of that cardigan too. Have you… had any tea today?" He watched Remus, eager for his answer.

"Yes, I drink it every day," Remus replied, slightly thrown by the question. "Why?"

"Oh. Nothing," Sirius said. "So, where are we going? Show me places people don't know. Secret places."

Remus considered what to do. In his silence, Sirius moved closer and grabbed Remus' arm. "Quickly, before Mother comes looking for me," he insisted. "She might burn my new clothes."

"Sure. I'll show you… uh… how about we just walk and see where we end up?"

"Perfect," Sirius murmured.

...oOo...

Sirius peeked out of the window of Remus' house before ducking behind the curtain. "Mother didn't see me, but we should sit tight for a while."

Remus nodded. "I was actually going to talk to you about something," he said. "Let me make you a cup of tea first though."

Sirius' eyes widened. "Tea with you? How could I say no?" he said, winking at Remus. He moved away from the window, following Remus as he headed to the kitchen. Remus got the teapot ready and made up two cups. He passed one to Sirius with a warm smile.

"So, what did you want to talk to me about?" Sirius asked, bringing the cup to his lips and wincing at the burning tea. "Crap, ouch. This is hot."

Remus stared at him for a long minute. Of course it was hot. Sirius had watched Remus boil the water. Sirius stared back, clearly waiting for an answer to the question.

"It's quite… a delicate subject," Remus finally said, leading the way back into the living room. The pair sat on the sofa, Sirius choosing to sit right in the middle, his body turned towards Remus' and his knees touching Remus' knees.

"You can talk to me about it," Sirius murmured, his free hand reaching out and resting on Remus' knee. Remus looked at Sirius hand, wondering what was causing the butterflies in his stomach and why. He struggled to keep his breathing easy.

He sipped at his tea and Sirius did the same, before he set the cup down.

"The girls in town have previously shown interest in me," he said. "But I don't feel the same. I… they don't… and Alice pointed out that you've had female interest and are perhaps in the same boat I am."

"So you want this too?" Sirius asked, setting his cup down. "I hoped from the first moment I saw you that you'd feel this too." Before Remus could ask what 'this' was, Sirius was leaning in close, his lips finding Remus'.

And though Remus knew he should push Sirius back because Sirius was a man and men didn't kiss (did they?), his heart was pounding and everything felt perfect and the hand that came up to push Sirius ended up fisting Sirius' shirt, pulling him closer.

...oOo...

"I don't understand," Remus said, when they finally broke apart and he realised what had actually happened. "Men don't kiss."

"Sure they do," Sirius replied, somewhat warily as he took in Remus' lost expression. "They don't talk about it much, but some do."

"Why?"

"Because some men love women and some men love other men. Also, just to be clear - some women love women."

"But… but how? I don't… I can't…"

Sirius stared at Remus. "You do and you can," he said, making it sound so simply. "Remus, you're gorgeous - beautiful - and the first moment I saw you, I wanted you. I want you now. I want to kiss you again. I want to do more than that. I don't feel these things for women in fact I never have. Just men. When you said we're the same, you're right."

"But I'm expected to settle down with a woman," Remus said.

Sirius shook his head. "Maybe you eventually do, but I felt it in that kiss - you like me. You want me back. You pulled me closer. Your hands were in my hair and everything."

"It can't happen again," Remus said, glancing at his knees.

"It can and it will," Sirius insisted softly. "Because this is who you are. Maybe now you have a name to put to it - you're gay, Remus. And one day you won't be able to pretend anymore. You'll try and be with a woman and you'll realise you can't do it."

"Have you tried?"

Sirius nodded. "Mother likes to arrange my relationships. I used to try and make it work, but now I understand why it never did. I'll keep lying and pretending until the day comes where my parents try and get me married to one of them - that's the day that I leave and never come back. I'm not going to pretend to be someone else."

"You're pretending now."

"I am, but so are you," Sirius insisted. "Remus, I like you. I'm attracted to you and if you want me in return, I'll… I don't even know. I've never liked anyone this much. But I'll… I'll…"

"I think maybe you should leave," Remus muttered.

"Remus, please," Sirius said pleadingly, his voice soft. "I'll leave if you really don't want me here, but maybe… you're confused right now, I can see that. I thought you were aware of your attraction - I could see it in your eyes each time they met mine at the teahouse - maybe we could talk. I hate to leave, knowing you're confused. Knowing that I've impacted your life now."

Remus shook his head. "You've made an impact," he replied quietly. "Maybe I didn't know who I was, but I was able to cope with that. Now you're showing me just how different I am. People won't accept this."

"People don't accept a lot of things," Sirius replied. "I won't leave until I know you're sure you want me to."

"I've never kissed anyone before," Remus admitted. "I never wanted to until now. I don't know if I can be who you want me to be."

Sirius smiled. "I like you as you are. The you I met in the teahouse. The you that was so shy, looking away each time I glanced over. The you whose cheeks turn really red. I like the way you clung to me during that kiss, pulling at my shirt, pulling me closer."

"That was a mistake," Remus whispered. "I should have pushed you away."

Sirius' hopeful look faded. "A mistake?" Remus flinched at the hurt in his voice. "I'm sorry you feel that way. In my opinion, that was the most amazing kiss I've ever experienced in my life." He reached for his hat. "You know where to find me if you change your mind."

"You're going?" Remus asked.

Sirius hesitated. "I'm not sure that I'm very welcome here," he admitted. "I'll stay if you ask me to stay."

Remus didn't reply. He was certain Sirius could see the confusion and conflict on his face, so he ducked his head. A minute passed before Sirius walked out of the room and a moment after that, Remus heard the door close as Sirius left.

His fingers moved to his lips. The kiss had been more amazing than he had ever considered - had it been because he had just underestimated what a kiss would feel like. Or was it because of this attraction to Sirius, which he couldn't even deny he felt.

Or maybe Sirius was just so skilled at kissing.

Yes. That was it. Anyone who had practice in kissing would be able to make it amazing, plus James had described kissing as the best feeling in the world. That had to be it. His feelings were just confused because he had kissed a man instead of a woman.

So if he kissed a woman, it would certainly resolve this confusion. Remus stood up and took a deep breath. The town dance was in a few days. Most of the girls had dates and he was certain that James had asked Alice by now. James. James would know who didn't have a date.

He ran his hands over his clothes, smoothing them down, before taking another minute to compose himself. He didn't want Sirius to think that he was rushing after him - he wanted to casually seek out James and ask who was left to ask.

Once he felt slightly more composed, he pushed down the confused feelings, stood up and left his house. When he saw Sirius walking slowly down the street, he kept his eyes diverted, not faltering in his step though something inside was pressing him to stop - something was telling him to go to Sirius and grab him and never let go. To stop being stupid.

But he kept walking, trying not to listen to the crunch of gravel behind him as Sirius sped up, though Sirius still kept his distance. Remus headed to the bank to find James and Sirius turned onto the path that led to his house.

Only then did Remus turn to look. Sirius' posture was so different from what he had seen earlier. Gone was the confident air. Now Sirius' hands were shoved into his jeans and he was slouched as he walked, his head down.

Remus wanted to go after him - talk to him - do something. But he couldn't. Doing that may give Sirius the wrong impression.

He forced himself to turn away once more and he walked into the bank.

...oOo...

"Let me get this straight," James said, eagerly leaning forward on his desk. "You _want_ me to set you up on a date?"

Remus nodded.

"Because… because it's time you found a nice girl?"

Remus nodded again.

"But which girl?" James asked. "Blonde? Redhead? Dark hair? Tall? Short? Big…" he lowered his voice and glanced around to make sure no-one was listening, before continuing. "Bosoms…" he waggled his eyebrows.

"Black hair," Remus blurted out before stopping himself. "Uh… tall...ish. Chest… I'm not… picky."

"Well, that's Mary, isn't it?" James said, sitting back and grinning. "Only girl with black hair around here. She's not got a date to the dance yet."

"Okay. Yes, Mary is nice," Remus said. He often talked to Mary in the town library where she worked alongside Amelia. "We have things in common at least."

James' smile widened. "My little Remus, all grown up and dating. Soon you'll be married and have kids…"

"Let's not get ahead of ourselves," Remus quickly said, shaking his head. "I just… it's one dance. Let's just get through this dance, okay?"

James stared at him, his smile fading. "Remus, there's something else, isn't there?"

"What do you mean?" Remus asked, trying to hide the panic in his voice.

"I've known you for our entire lives, Remus. You're keeping something from me. I could tell something was up the other day at the teahouse. You were distracted, then when you came in here, requesting a date to the dance. So more than one something. You know you can tell me anything, right?

Remus shrugged his shoulders. "I'm not sure anything is up. I just think it's time to find a nice girl. That's what I need."

James watched him. "I'll let it slide for now," he said, his eyes narrowing slightly. "But only for now. Whatever is on your mind - whatever has caused you to need a date this urgently… you're going to tell me because something is wrong and it doesn't help to keep it to yourself. Maybe I can help?"

Remus shook his head. "I can't talk about it today. It may be nothing… just let's get through the dance first."

James nodded, leaning back in his seat. "You know I'm here for you anytime?"

"I know," Remus murmured. "But I'm not ready to talk. When I am… you'll be who I come to."

...oOo...

Mary's arm through his, Remus led the way into the town hall and looked around. It didn't take him long to spot James. "Do you mind if we go and stand with James?" he asked.

Mary nodded. "It's fine," she replied. "Do you think Amelia is here yet?"

Remus glanced around again, not spotting the blonde. He shook his head. "I'll keep a watch out though," he replied, guiding them across the room.

"Remus, you came," James said happily. "I thought you'd panic at the last minute and cancel."

"Of course not. Mary was expecting me to pick her up and I wasn't going to let her down," Remus said. He glanced at Mary. "Would you like a drink?"

She shook her head. "Alice, what a lovely dress."

"You look beautiful," Remus added, smiling at Alice.

"Thank you. I thought… you know, it's a dance. I wanted to look nice - it was a reason to dress up." Remus wasn't fooled by her casual tone, more focused on the way she glanced at James. "You look lovely too, Mary."

Mary beamed at her. "Thank you. Can you believe Remus finally asked someone out to one of these? I've never known him to do this."

"You've been asked out by the best," James insisted, jumping in. "I asked his type and he said he was looking for someone with black hair. Only one girl in town with black hair, so…" he trailed off.

Mary smiled shyly. "I'm flattered," she replied. "How about a dan—"

"Hi, I'm Sirius Black!" came a loud voice, quickly interrupting the conversation. "Hi Remus, care to introduce me around? I've not met anyone else in town yet."

Remus turned to Sirius quickly, unable to help the way his eyes drifted down Sirius' body. Sirius was in another suit though it seemed to be slightly tighter than people tended to wear. "Sirius, it's… it's good to see you. I didn't expect you to be here."

Sirius smiled. "I was in the library yesterday and overheard that this lovely lady was going to miss the dance. I offered to take her. I'll assume you all know Amelia?"

"James Potter," James said, reaching a hand out and shaking Sirius'. "I think I met you briefly in the bank."

"Good to meet you officially," Sirius said, grinning at him, before letting go of his hand. "And this vision of beauty at your side?" He reached for Alice's hand, bringing it to his lips and placing a kiss to it.

Alice let out a little giggle as James slipped an arm around her waist. "My date, Alice."

Sirius winked at her before turning back to Remus. "And Mary, looking beautiful, but don't you always?" He took her hand, kissing the back of it too, before turning back to his date. "Amelia, do you want a refreshment?"

"No thank you," she replied, her gaze lingering on Mary. "How about a dance?"

Sirius grinned. "I am an excellent dancer," he said, holding out his hand.

Remus watched as Sirius and Amelia headed to the dance floor hand in hand, a scowl on his face. It remained there until he felt a nudge.

He turned his head, meeting James' concerned look. Their dates were talking, not paying him any attention at all.

"Okay, what's wrong? Is it to do with Sirius? I thought you two were friends?"

"What gave you that idea?" Remus asked, glancing over at Sirius on the dance floor, unable to push aside the jealousy he felt at the sight of Sirius dancing with Amelia.

"Because he's always hanging around by the teahouse when you're working. I saw him standing outside of there almost every day. He's been in the library too and I know you're always in there. The other day I walked past and saw you both go into your house. You spend a lot of time together."

Remus opened his mouth and closed it again. What could he really say? That he hated that Amelia was dancing with Sirius? That he wanted to be in Sirius' embrace?

No. He didn't even want to admit that to himself. "Mary, would you like to dance?" he said, turning away from James and holding out his hand.

...oOo...

Grey eyes met his as the pair moved around the dance floor. Remus tried to look away, but it was hard not to watch as Sirius held Amelia close. It was hard to miss the laughter from the girl as Sirius leaned in to whisper in her ear.

But finally he forced his attention to his own date. Mary was lovely.

Mary beamed at him and his gaze darted down to her lips. "Can… can I?" he asked, nervously.

Mary turned her head to look at the couple dancing behind them before glancing back at Remus and nodding. Remus took a deep breath and leaned in, forcing his gaze to stay on Mary.

But as his mouth moved closer, it felt wrong. When his lips touched Mary's lips, he realised that it wasn't the kiss that mattered - it was the person.

He pulled away, shaking his head.

"That didn't feel right, did it?" Mary asked, a knowing tone to her voice.

Remus stared at her, eyes wide.

"Go after them," she hissed. "Before it's too late."

"But…"

"I didn't feel anything either," Mary murmured. "Go after them." She stepped away, turning towards where James and Alice were standing. Remus glanced around for Sirius, searching the room as the dance floor was empty now.

He caught a glimpse of Sirius as he left the town hall, and Remus rushed towards the doors. What if Sirius kissed Amelia? What if he liked it? He ran out of the door, his eyes scouring the hallway and then the nearby grounds for dark hair.

He rounded the corner of the building, almost falling into Sirius in the process.

"Remus?"

"Sirius," Remus said, grabbing Sirius by the front of his suit. "Wait."

"Why? So I can watch you and _her_ again?" Sirius snapped.

"You didn't have to come here," Remus argued.

"I came to see you," Sirius said. "I just wanted to spend time in a social setting with you where… where you'd want to talk to me and maybe we could at least be friends. I didn't know how to approach you outside of here. I thought that… this was the only way we could talk and then you go and rub your new relationship in my face? What do you want from me? You could have at least waited for me to leave or…"

Remus didn't listen to anything else. Before he knew what he was doing, he was pulling Sirius closer, finding Sirius' lips and letting go of Sirius, instead moving his hands around Sirius' neck.

Sirius grasped Remus' clothes, pulling him closer, kissing his desperately. The kiss felt right - perfect - and it wasn't because Sirius was a good kisser. It was because it was Sirius and this might be wrong or different - Remus didn't know which - but it was also very very right.

Remus didn't have a clue what he was doing but Sirius appeared to be very eager in leading the kiss, coaxing Remus' lips open before deepening it.

Remus couldn't even think straight so he allowed himself to think only of the way he felt at that moment. He would worry about everything else later.

They pulled apart slightly, hands still holding each other, and Remus rested his forehead against Sirius'. "We shouldn't be doing this."

"I disagree. I think this is exactly what we should be doing."

"You'll be leaving in a few months," Remus murmured.

"Give me a reason to stay," Sirius demanded.

"Me," Remus replied. "Am I reason enough?"

"You are," Sirius said. "I won't ever tire of this." He tilted his head, finding Remus' lips again. Remus didn't hesitate, ready to lose himself, until he heard a gasp from nearby.

Immediately he pulled away, spinning around. How could he be so stupid to do this where people could see?

"James! Alice! It's not… I mean… what are you doing out here?"

Alice's eyes were wide as she looked between the pair.

"It's okay, Alice, it's Remus," James said firmly.

Alice nodded her head. "I'm going to head back inside," she said. "I won't say a word, but I feel like whatever happens now, I'll be intruding." She turned and headed inside and Remus moved to step away from Sirius. Sirius kept a firm grip on Remus' arm, his gaze defiant as he looked at James.

"You abandoned your date. Mary—"

"Felt nothing from the kiss, same as me," Remus filled in. "She worked it out and sent me out after them."

"Sirius, your date…"

"We came as friends. I made that very clear," Sirius said. "I came here to see Remus."

"So… you both took girls here so you could sneak around together?" James accused. "I don't approve of you playing with their hearts like that."

"I really did want a date," Remus admitted. "I didn't want to hurt anyone."

"So you kissed Mary and now you're out here kissing him?" James pushed.

"Because I thought that kissing a woman was the solution," Remus said. "Sirius kissed me and I freaked out because it felt right. I told myself that it only felt right because it was a good kiss. I kidded myself that kissing Mary would feel just as right, but it felt wrong. I knew it was because it was who I kissed." He paused, waiting for James' reaction but the expression on his friend's face gave nothing away.

"Please don't hate me," Remus added desperately. "I can't help who I love, James."

"Love? Remus, I don't hate you. I just hate that you both dragged Mary and Amelia into this," James insisted. "You know I travel for business - I've seen this before and you're like a brother to me. I just want you to be happy. But what happens when Sirius' family leaves? What happens when Sirius moves to the next town? Is he going to make a commitment to you? I don't want you to get hurt."

"Commitment?" Remus laughed softly. "Is there a law that allows men to marry?" An arm slipped protectively around him.

"Maybe what we have started out rocky and confusing but I'm not here to hurt Remus," Sirius said. "It's been a short time but I was transfixed the moment our eyes met for the first time in the teahouse and I knew from our first kiss that I wanted a future with Remus. I don't know how we'll have one, but that's not going to stop me. It broke my heart when he didn't want me after that kiss. I came here tonight hoping to at least fix things enough to be friends. I never led Amelia to believe there was anything - in fact, I think her heart may already belong to someone."

"You'll stay?" Remus asked.

"If you want me to stay, I'll be here with you," Sirius insisted. "No-one has ever wanted a future with me before. I'd be a fool to leave when I could spend my life with you."

"People won't like this," Remus insisted.

"I don't care. Let people hate what we have - we love each other… but you care, don't you?" Sirius leaned in, gently pressing a kiss to Remus' lips. "For you, we can hide this. Keep our relationship behind closed doors. Anything for you."

"Closed doors for now," Remus murmured softly. "An hour ago I was convincing myself I could love a woman and denying every feeling for you. I'm not ready to face the world with that."

"I understand. I was sixteen when I first kissed a man and I've been there. My family are supposed to move on in a few weeks - sell the house on - but I'm going to stay here with you. But there are conditions."

"Anything," Remus murmured.

"You don't date anyone else. Not even for show," Sirius said. "No fake courting a woman just so you can hide what we have."

Remus looked at James briefly. "I agree," he said softly.

"You… I want to live together at some point. Would you at least tell your mother? If you are able to do that, we wouldn't have to hide it from her too."

"Would you tell yours?" Remus asked quickly.

"I… I don't know if she'll accept it. But if you tell your mother, it's only fair I tell mine," he said. "Finally - if something that happens between us… if you're not ready, overwhelmed, or need to pull the brakes on things for a short time… or even if you want us to take a step backwards, you tell me. Because I'll never rush anything with you. I'll never do anything to make you uncomfortable- but at the same time, I can't read your mind so won't know these things unless you tell me. So you need to be very open and clear with me. I won't be upset so you can tell me anything."

"Those sound like fair terms to start a relationship upon," James said. "I suggest that you step away from each other though before people come back outside."

"It's a shame - the only person I wanted to dance with tonight is Remus," Sirius murmured.

"Mum will be waiting up for me, so you can't come over for that dance," Remus said.

James considered what they were saying. "What about in the office? I have Dad's keys to the building. I can open the office and you'll still be able to hear the music."

Sirius grinned. "You know, I had a good feeling about you and that feeling was right."

"One song," James added. "I'll stand guard by the door, but you only get one song."

...oOo...

"I've been with a few men since I was sixteen… not one of them saw me as more than… something to be ashamed of," Sirius murmured, his lips inches from Remus' ear as they danced.

"What do you mean?" Remus asked, content in Sirius' arms.

"They had women - they'd pretend that the women knew - that the relationships were just for show and their girls knew the truth. But then they'd go and marry them, or the girls would turn up pregnant and each time, I'd get hurt. I don't want that hurt again, Remus. I want to fall in love and know that I'm that man's only love - that I'm the only one you'll love."

"After that kiss, I don't think I could ever pretend with a woman," Remus murmured. "Everything felt wrong. It's just that you were dancing with Amelia and… and I was jealous so wanted to dance so I could… I'm sorry. I can't even imagine how much it'd hurt if I saw you kiss Amelia. I'm sorry that I kissed Mary."

"Don't be," Sirius murmured. "If that's what made you realise that you wanted to be with me, don't be sorry. But right now, we're together, so from here on out, I'll expect you to be faithful."

"I promise. As long as you do."

Sirius smiled. "I will," he insisted. "But you'll hear around town that my mother is trying to find me a wife. I'll talk to her of course. No-one can compare to you - especially no woman. If only we could stay like this forever."

There was a tap on the door and the pair separated reluctantly. "Back to reality."

"Back to our dates," Remus muttered sadly. "After I walk Mary home…"

"How about we walk our dates home as a group? I'd like to be able to walk you home too, which won't look strange if we do it this way."

Remus beamed at him. "Sounds perfect."

...oOo...

In the shadows of the porch, hidden by everyone, Remus kissed Sirius deeply. Though there had been a lot of talking that night, he was still so confused and was scared that a relationship that couldn't result in marriage wouldn't last as there was no commitment. What if Sirius left? What if Sirius found someone else?

He had to show Sirius that he wanted him, so he deepened the kiss, fingers winding through dark hair. Sirius' hands wrapped around his waist, tugging him close.

The lights were off in the house and Remus assumed his mother had fallen asleep already. No-one would see what he was doing.

But two for two, before he knew what was happening, the door had opened and his mother was standing there. He couldn't untangle himself from Sirius fast enough, filled with terror at his mother's reaction.

"This explains your odd behaviour," she said, looking like she was ready to fall into bed. "Inside."

The pair walked into the house.

"You have a beautiful home, Mrs Lupin," Sirius said nervously, before Hope closed the door and turned to them.

"If you hurt my son, I'll not be very forgiving," Hope said firmly. "Remus is my entire family. I approve anything that makes him happy - you are welcome for dinner, but you abide by the same rules I'd set if he brought a woman over. I'd expect him to respect her at all times, and wait until marriage. You'll wait until you're able to show a commitment to my son, so no being alone with each other just yet. When his father was alive, Sunday was the day we had family dinner. Therefore I expect you over tomorrow at four."

"Yes, Ma'am." Sirius hesitated. "I assure you that I'll make as much commitment as it's possible. That I'll treat him with all the respect Remus deserves. I love your son, Mrs Lupin, and I hope you'll see that over time. When my family leave in a few weeks, I won't be leaving with them. I'm going to find a way to remain here - to spend my life wherever your son is."

Hope's lips curved into a smile. "You have one minute," she said. "Say your goodnights." She turned towards the kitchen, leaving Remus and Sirius alone.

"That went well," Sirius murmured. "Your mother is very accepting."

"We only have each other. I think if she didn't approve, she wouldn't have said anything about it. She wouldn't want to lose me."

"There's a difference between not saying anything and accepting me into your home for dinner each week," Sirius said. "She wants to get to know me over these dinners, which means she understands what we mean to each other. I best go, but I'll be here for dinner tomorrow."

"I'll miss you," Remus blurted out.

"Every moment you're not in my arms, I miss you," Sirius replied. "Goodnight, my love."

"Goodnight," Remus whispered as Sirius brushed their lips together. He didn't take his eyes off Sirius as the man opened the door and left, heading down the steps and down the path. When he couldn't see Sirius or hear his footsteps anymore, he closed the door and turned. His mother was standing, watching him.

"You're sure about this?" she checked.

"I love him," Remus replied. "Finally everything makes sense."

"And this… this came out of the blue?"

"We had a connection when we first met. I didn't understand the attraction, I… I had no idea that I'd be attracted to men. I just assumed that I hadn't found the right woman. But we kissed a few days ago and it felt right. I told myself that it was the kiss that felt right, and not who kissed me. But earlier I kissed Mary at the dance. It wasn't until that kiss that I realised that it was Sirius I wanted. That I had already started falling in love with him but was lying to myself about it. I want whatever future comes with being with Sirius."

"I just wanted to be sure," Hope said. "I love you and if this is what you choose - who you choose - I'm not going to stand in the way or make things difficult. As long as Sirius treats you right. I suggest holding off any romantic… endeavors until he's proven that he's going to stick around and not leave with his family."

"You're right. I'm scared that this will end the moment his mother says it's time to move on. I don't think I can let him go."

"If he chooses to leave, you'll need to accept that and let him go. There will be other men, now you know. But the way he looks at you… I'd be shocked if he ever left you. Goodnight, my darling." She placed a kiss on Remus' cheek, before heading upstairs to her bedroom.

...oOo...

"I told her," Sirius said, his voice shaking. "She didn't take it well. She gave me two choices. I need to marry a woman and basically live a lie, or leave."

For a short moment, Remus thought Sirius was there to end things after three short weeks together, but his gaze fell to the suitcase Sirius was holding. "What will you do now?" he asked softly.

"I'm going to the inn," Sirius said. "I have money so it won't be a problem. I just… I just needed to see you first."

"Let me walk you to the inn," Remus insisted. "We can have something to eat."

Sirius slowly nodded his head. "I'd like that," he murmured. He reached out for Remus' hand for a moment, before letting go. "If anyone asks you can just say you saw me when I was walking and decided to keep me company."

"I have to work in a while. Maybe we could come go to the teahouse afterwards? James is often there. I don't want to leave you alone right now."

Sirius nodded, looking quite lost and Remus closed the door behind him, taking a moment to study Sirius. His boyfriend was wearing the jeans and chaps again, cowboy boots and a shirt that was open for the top two buttons. He was wearing a different cowboy hat.

Remus was starting to get used to the look. Perhaps if Sirius stayed, he could wear that sort of thing all of the time?

"Come on, let's get you to the inn," he murmured, wishing Sirius could stay with him instead.

...oOo...

Satisfied that Sirius was comfortable, Remus stepped behind the counter to get some cakes for him. Alice had just finished her shift and had joined James at the table next to Sirius, but Remus hoped Sirius would eventually turn around and join James. Sirius had been reluctant as James was in there with his parents.

He took a plate out and set it on the counter, his eyes moving over the goods his mother had made that morning. After some thought, he picked out a large piece of apple crumble and set it onto the plate,

Just as he was about to walk over, the door opened, stopping Remus in his tracks. He hadn't expected to see Walburga so soon, and, judging by the look on Sirius' face, he hadn't expected it either.

Her gaze moved around the room, before settling on Sirius and she began to walk over. Remus hesitated by the counter.

"She looks… this doesn't look good," Hope said, coming up behind Remus.

"Darling," Walburga said, coming up to the table. "I've decided to overlook your… little 'confession'."

"You… you have?" Sirius' face lit up. "You accept it?"

Her lips twisted into a sneer quicker than Remus had ever seen happen to someone. "No, but I'll overlook this depravity. You can come back into the family. I'll arrange a marriage for you. I hear Pearl Parkinson is looking for a husband. We'll travel tomorrow and get this marriage sorted."

Sirius stared at her for a long moment and Remus felt fear well up inside of him - what if Sirius took up this offer? Before he knew what he was doing, he was at Sirius' side. "He's not going to do that."

Silence followed, before Walburga let out an amused laugh. "Really, Sirius. If you had to do something so disgusting, I'd have imagined you'd have chosen someone… like the mayor's son or…"

Sirius looked at Remus helplessly, and Remus placed his hand on Sirius' shoulder.

"Being in love is not disgusting," Remus said firmly. "Sirius has made his choice and he's staying here." Sirius stood up quickly, taking Remus' hand in his.

"This is unnatural," Walburga began. "Two men—"

"I think you should leave my teahouse," Hope said, marching over. "Anyone who doesn't approve of my son's choice isn't welcome here." She looked around. "This goes for all of you. Anyone who doesn't approve of my son isn't welcome."

"Sirius, this is your last chance," Walburga said, ignoring Hope.

"I'm staying here with Remus," Sirius replied, his hand squeezing Remus'. "I love him and he loves me."

"You're giving up your family, your inheritance, social status."

"I'm gaining a family here, I'll get a job and I get to be with Remus. I get to… I get to be who I really am inside. That matters more than social status," Sirius said. "I'll live in the inn for now until I get a place, but I'm not leaving this town."

"And no-one will accept you here," Walburga sneered.

"Remus is my best friend," James said, also standing. "I accept him and whoever he loves, no matter if it's a woman or a man. I accept Sirius."

"Me too," Alice said.

"And us," Mary called from across the room, grabbing Amelia's hand in her own.

"Mrs Black, Remus is family to a lot of people around here," Charlus Potter said, frowning at the woman, having quickly overcome his shock at the revelation. "Your son matters to him which makes him as much family as Remus is." Dorea nodded her head in agreement.

"I accept my son," Hope said angrily. "He's loved by the town. He grew up with these people, he talks to them daily as they come in. Anyone that truly matters or cares will accept him and by extension, accept Sirius as his partner and the… the man he loves. As for family, Sirius won't be without. As a mother you should love your child unconditionally. If you're unable to do so, you aren't fit to be a parent. You aren't welcome here any longer so I suggest you leave." Hope was angrier than Remus had ever seen her. "As for him staying in the inn… that's not happening. He'll be staying with me so if you ever want to apologise to him, you know where to find him - with the people that care about him!"

Remus watched as Walburga stormed from the place. "Well, that's our secret out," he said nervously.

Sirius turned to him, his hand cupping Remus' jaw. "Thank you," he murmured. "No-one has ever stood up for me before."

"I wasn't going to let you go without a fight," Remus insisted. "I love you."

Sirius beamed at him. "I love you too. I had no intention of ever leaving you. So… now that this secret isn't a secret any longer, there's something I want to ask you."

"Anything," Remus murmured.

"There's another dance at the town hall next month. Will you be my date?"

"Of course!"

* * *

Review Please

* * *

Written for:

Hogwarts Forum of Witchcraft and Wizardry (writers should totally check out the link to it on my profile!)

Assignment 8 - Muggle History: Task 2 - Aaron Burr sir: Write about someone fighting for what they want

Auction - Western

Couple Appreciation - First Meet

Film Festival - Character: Virgin

TV Addicts Challenge - Bates Motel: Write about a mother's boy (bonus), (scenario) moving to a new town, scenario: mother being unhappy about son dating.

Scavenger Hunt - Coffee Shop AU

Writing Club:

Character Appreciation - Business Owner

Disney Challenge - Write about a mother

Amber's Attic - Fear is only a verb if you let it be. Dont' you dare let go of my hand.

Showtime - Write about someone being loved

Liza's Loves - Western and Coffee-Shop

Count Your Buttons - Pairings: James/Alice

Lyric Alley - You get me every time

Guess the name - Western

Easter Bingo- Western


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